My Journey to Healing, as a spouse of a recovering Porn addict.

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

quote

Deseret book posted this on their face book page today.  Or another day maybe, but someone liked it and it showed up in my face book feed today.

So before I posted that I am not sure what to do at this point in my life/ situation.  A couple of weeks in out new book (that the last post also talked about) there was a section on support.  It talked about using your ecclesiastical support, and asked questions about what support you needed more of and what not.
So I went to see my Bishop. It was amazing. Then I came home and saw this.  I feel like I have been heard and validated now.  I have no more answers.  But I do know my Bishop is aware of my feelings, and thoughts.  As is My Heavenly Father.  I may not have the answers right now, but that's ok.  If He can part the red sea he can help me.
I didnt expect much from my Bishop because really I had no questions.  He didn't give me answers.  I didn't expect any answers because really, there are none.  but there is a path through this, I just have to ask to be led to it.
What I did get from my conversation with my Bishop was comfort.  Was knowing that I had communicated with my ecclesiastical leader my thoughts and feelings and now he knows where I stand and what I feel.  He didn't know before.  For all I know I am the first wife of an addict he has talked to, and now maybe he has something more to go on if he gets the opportunity to talk to another.  and maybe something that was said in our meeting will be helpful to them.  Maybe it will be helpful to him.  I know the things that were said were helpful to me.
I am so thankful for the inspiration we received to move here, and to stay in the Ward we were in when we decided to buy a house.  I fell comforted in knowing that whatever decision is made and whenever it is made my Leader has some background and knows I went into this decision with faith and prayer.  I know he will be behind me no matter what. and now that I have spilled my guts I can talk to him again and it will be easier, and maybe there will be answers, maybe there won't be.  Who knows.
I'm comfortable with that.  It's a good thing.  For now.