My Journey to Healing, as a spouse of a recovering Porn addict.

Thursday, February 19, 2015

Who's on the Lord's side?

Ugh.  So I thought I had learned my lesson last time when I kept having the prompting to sign up for life flight insurance and I didn't so we  didn't have it when we needed it.

Apparently I didn't Several days ago at Parent Teacher Conferences for the Littlest (she goes to preschool still at the Child Development Center a place for kids with special needs) there was a guy there with a table.  I felt drawn to the table bit waved it off.  all 3 kids were with us, we had a conference to go to... The guy even talked to us and tried to attract us to his table.  We didn't go.

I haven't slept since.  Literally!  It has sucked!  I finally asked my Heavenly Father why I wasn't sleeping.  Today I realized that I have been waiting and watching for that guy to come back to the CDC with his table.
Also as a back track side note, The Boy has been struggling again with school.  We had again at the beginning of this year requested that he be tested again for Dyslexia.  We were again denied and not only that we lost our 504 plan for him.  I wasn't really ok with that but with the things they said and with the summer we had and all the fighting I have done for him through the years I just gave up.  I thought we would let it ride out and see where it went.

It's been going downhill.  Slowly, ever so slowly.  But it has really been in our faces the last month or so.

He tried to get into quest, a program for advanced kids.  He didn't get in.  We called the lady in charge, she said he didn't finish the tests.  So they have a round about way of getting in through an IQ test.  We know his IQ is high because years ago it was tested as part of the ADOS test for Autism.  so it was tested again.  His IQ is 133.  Well through the course of this we found out he got every single one of the Quest test questions right, of the ones he answered anyway...

He has talked to me lately about struggling in school.  It hurts because I always struggled.  But I felt like I was out of options.  The Principal, the diagnostician, the nurse all said they didn't think he needed testing for a learning disability because they didn't see it.  Even though his P's 3's and 5's are all still backwards and he puts a capital D all the time even when it needs a low d. I asked him why the other day.  He said because the big D is easy to remember which way it goes so he uses that instead.

the people in our 504 meeting stated that because they aren't always backwards then it's just a matter of lazy habit.  because he knows they are backwards and he will put them forwards sometimes.  So we just need to keep pointing it out and correcting it and he will get into the habit of doing it right.

Lately I have thought a lot about homeschooling because the system is failing my child.  I haven't though because I have felt that that isnt our answer, that we would be running away.  Don't get me wrong I am NOT saying that homeschooling is running away.  I have homeschooling friends and family and that works for them and that is fantastic.  They are doing what they need and I admire and respect them.  It's just for us that isn't the answer.  Someone needs to stay and fight the system from the outside as much as we need those fighting the system from the outside by homeschooling.

So back to where we were at the beginning.
The guy at the table.  Today I felt like the answer to my not sleeping was staring me in the face and I had to find it.  There was the guy at the table at drop off today.  I fought with the spirit still!  UGH!  I didn't want to stop, I had to go to Zumba this morning.  Stop anyway.  So I did.  I thought why am I here?  The Littlest has all she needs we are confident with where she is at.  I looked at his pamphlets.  Picked up one on learning disabilities, another on Autism, a third on sensory disorders.  Then it hit me.  This table isn't for The Littlest, it's here for The Boy.  I am to talk to this man about The Boy.  DUH!  Wow.  So I did.  Turns out this man is the parent liaison for the school district.  Mostly there to help those of us at the CDC get what we need to transition to the school district.  But he is also there for the kids who are being failed by the school district.  his boss is second in command of Special services at the District level.  I told him a little of our story.  I told him about Quest testing, the IQ testing, the repeated requests for Dyslexia testing and the repeated denial even though I have submitted a request in writing.  Yadayadayada.  Guess what we have now?  We have a meeting scheduled with the special Ed department at the District office.

Who's on the Lord's side?  I am.  We are.  We have been praying about the school situation, the discouraged child.  The Lord led me to the person/people that can help.  I had given up.  Not anymore.  This mama bear is back and she has her advocacy pants on.  Watch out!  Not only that but we are now equally yoked with our Savior. I know this is where we are supposed to be, what we are supposed to pursue at this time.  I know because my Heavenly Father has led me to the man at the table. Not only that but we are now equally yoked with our Savior. As we read in Mathew 11  28 ¶Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
 29 Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.
 30 For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light. (

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